ASTHMATIC ASTRONAUT REMIXES BELLERUCHE

Asthmatic Astronaut is one of the key players behind Black Lantern Music, Chemical Poets, and live sensations Underling, and an enormously respected producer in his own right. Recently, he has been working with the superlative hip-hop / jazz / soul label Tru-Thoughts (home of Quantic, among many others). His next project for them has just been announced.

From Asthmatic Astronaut's MySpace Blog:

"Belleruche have a new release called, Liberty EP, due out on 1st March. Featuring some brand spanking new material and some excellent remixes and accoustic versions, this will be available as a download and on vinyl (with CD insert) – one for the collectors. And my remix of 'You're Listening to the Worlds' can be found on there also."

The EP is released March 1st on Tru-Thoughts.

Download Asthmatic Astronaut music at Black Lantern Music:

Lifeshows & Asthmatic Astronaut - Inbetween EP

Dejine Compilation - mixed & compiled by Asthmatic Astronaut

'Impact (ft. Harlequinade)' on Texture's Aphasia EP - production by Asthmatic Astronaut

ALL HAIL DJ TACOPUNCH

Meet one of my favourite DJs: the immortal TACOPUNCH. This guy mashes up breakcore, EBM and electro, hardcore and techno, industrial, and fuck knows what else into a glitched-up, tripped-out sonic assault that will leave you reeling. I came across Tacopunch on Whitechapel's DJ Mix thread, and the guy just keeps posting better and better mixes. Here are some links to a few of my favourites:

DJ Tacopunch is a Tactical Ass Implant [EBM / Electro / Industrial]
Grr! Spit! Breathe Fire! [Gabba / Breakcore / Grind]
FASTER Killhamster! Kill! Kill! KILL! [IED Rave Shrapnel]
Hold On To Yr Glitches & Bitches [Live @ Unicorn vs Robocop - Pt 1]
Am I Raving Yet? [Live @ Unicorn vs Robocop - Pt 2]
Didyouhearaboutthehalflingonherweddingnight? [Breakcore madness]

All hail Tacopunch!

3 REVIEWS OF APHASIA

Thanks to everyone who reviewed Aphasia. I'm chuffed to bits with the response. Click through for the full reviews!

"Stakes a firm claim for BLM's position as one of the top labels out there... Strikes a proper balance between lyricism and production as opposed to obsessively focusing on the former in the absence of the latter... A nice depth of sound, which leads to an immersive listening experience, heavy beats deftly drawing you in... Luscious, hypnotic... Tortuously deep flows."
- Dylan Orchard, for The Creative Uncommons

"Two words: Fuck Yeah... Stalking through the shadows cast by spoken word, hip-hop, dubstep and trip/hop electronica, Aphasia worms its way into the hindbrain and whispers dark secrets in dissambled language... Aphasia's still not easy listening; Texture's abstract, bookworm approach to MCing demands intellectual fascination with density and obtuseness."
- Liam Arnold, Team Little Rock / Shallow Rave

"... A shimmering slick of cyberpunk hip-hop...These four tracks are fan-fucking-tastic. Impact doubles as a Black Lantern primer, with Texture and Harlquinade’s razor-sharp, dystopian verses barrelling over Asthmatic Astronaut’s hip-hop noir. While Texture is backed by longtime collaborator Morphamish on Distance, his own instrumental tracks are brilliant works, mesmeric and evocative. The gradual expanse of melody and phrasing of the kinetic Ram Dass in particular excites me... Go and download it immediately."
- Thanks Tom Hanks

NONFIC: SOCIAL REALIST SF BY WILL ELLWOOD

Will Ellwood is a young man with big ideas. He wants to Get Excited and Make Things. He also wants to Get Excited and Change Things. Here, Will turns his not inconsiderable passion and intelligence on the field of speculative fiction and fantasy - what problems it faces, where it can go from here, and what we as writers and artists can do to inspire change. Have a read of this, then pop back here and leave some comments for Will.

Something is wrong with science fiction & fantasy. Speculative Fiction in general. This is something that has been bugging me for a few months now. Maybe longer. Maybe years. I have been told that my argument is a defence of all fiction. But SF is my first love, the literature of my teenage years ...READ MORE

FICTION: MELVYN T. BAGGER'S ROCK HARDICK

Andre Navarro (writing as Melvyn T. Bagger) presents some deadly-serious Noir action. It's a hard-boiled pulp adventure. With added dick jokes. It will make you spit milk through your nostrils laughing. It might just arouse your girlfriend! It will definitely amaze, astound, and possibly even offend, as Melvyn T. Bagger puts the DICK back in DICK TRACY. Get it up ye.

Being a private detective wasn't going too well for ol' Rock Hardick, as one could tell from his office, covered in a layer of dust so thick you could no longer see the floor. The fan he had over his desk was as functional as a geriatric penis, and the view of New York City through the stained window showed putrid buildings rising like a battalion of middle fingers ...READ MORE

SERIAL: 2019, CHAPTER 3 - DEBATE

More world-layering from me: adding a heated radio debate to the arkology of 2019. Read from Chapter One if you're just starting. The concept is - these are broadcasts from a possible future nine years from now. Once I have published ten of these, I will open the world for other writers to set stories in. Email me for more information if you have any questions - editor.weaponizer@gmail.com.

2019 - CHAPTER 3 - DEBATE

FLASH: THE HOUR IS GETTING LATE

Introducing a new addition to the Weaponizer roster: K. Patrick Glover is the author of webcomic The Invisible Skein, and writes a column for Hypergeek. His first flash piece for us is a melancholic tale of madness, melody and apocalypse.

I always knew I’d be around for the end of the world. Don’t ask me how. It’s not like I’m a religious man, or a superstitious one. I didn’t sit around thinking about The Rapture or the prophecies of Nostradamus. I didn’t spend much time thinking about it at all. I just knew that I would be there for it, that it would happen in my lifetime ...READ MORE

THE PUFFIN: ONE-MAN AEROPLANE

Found via Whitechapel:



Full story here.

ALBION TO ARCADIA: ISSUE 2

Albion To Arcadia is a brand spanking new website and online magazine showcasing the best in new writing, art and photography.

Issue 2 Now Available... featuring a poem by Texture.

TEXTURE: APHASIA REVIEWED BY THE CREATIVE UNCOMMONS

"Stakes a firm claim for BLM's position as one of the top labels out there... Strikes a proper balance between lyricism and production as opposed to obsessively focusing on the former in the absence of the latter... A nice depth of sound, which leads to an immersive listening experience, heavy beats deftly drawing you in... Luscious, hypnotic... Tortuously deep flows."
- Dylan Orchard, for The Creative Uncommons

>>READ THE FULL REVIEW HERE

Thanks Dylan!

FREE MUSIC! TEXTURE - APHASIA EP

This one's been a long time coming.

Back in 2007, Warren Ellis selected my track Vilnius Colony for inclusion on his podcast, The4am. I made the track at home using Ableton Live, a crappy acoustic guitar, my journo's mic, some 1210s and the first 2 seconds of a Kool Keith record. Warren's endorsement was the spur I needed to keep working on my own beats, and so here we are three years later, with the first EP in a planned trilogy - Aphasia.

Aphasia means 'word salad' - it is an acquired language disorder. It's kind of a good way to describe the lyrics I write for Morphamish and Chemical Poets, too. Each of the EPs is named after a neurological dysfunction of some kind.

Vilnius Colony and Ram Dass were constructed by myself, with the assistance and post-production skills of Morphamish, who also wrote the beats for Distance. Impact features my fellow Chemical Poet and Sileni frontman Harlequinade on vocal duties; the beats were written and produced by the mighty Asthmatic Astronaut.

It's a fairly downbeat EP - there's some real darkness in the tracks that probably has something to do with the last turbulent year of my life. There'll be some more headfuckery and humour on the next EP, for which I've been recording material with Morphamish, Kid Ritalin, Lee Moffat, and the Chemical Poets.

Thanks for your support of Black Lantern Music. Please let me know what you think of the EP!

>>DOWNLOAD APHASIA

/texture out...

MORPHAMISH @ DUB KAOSS, TONIGHT!

Dub Kaoss is a new night for bass music (dubstep, drum and bass) starting tonight at The Citrus Club in Edinburgh. We're warming up at the moment to launch a new channel on Black Lantern Music, run by Morphamish, which will feature releases from the likes of Stick 430 and Blackmass Plastics, not to mention what Lo-Quality Music called the "twisted genius" of Morphamish himself. Urge Mode should be launching in February. To get a taste of what is to come on the channel, come down to the Citrus tonight for a storming live set from Morphamish, plus DJ and live support from Paranoise (Volume!), Mikey Static, Andrew Tactus, Covert Ops, and Dual Frequency. FREE before midnight, £3 after.

FREE MUSIC! VIGILANTE - BULLITT VS. BUSTA

The hip-hop mashup genre gained popularity with the release of Dangermouse's legendary Grey Album, which combined Beatles samples with Jay-Z accapellas. Now, there are lots of producers out there showcasing their skills using classic or pulp beats, and the accapellas of the world's favourite rappers. Results vary in quality, but one outstanding project which caught our ear recently was this album by Vigilante (ably assisted by Spytec).

Vigilante is the producer behind Great Ezcape, and a stalwart of the UK drum and bass scene. With Great Ezcape on hiatus,Vigilante has been active, moving into the world of film: his track was used in the trailer for 'Meet the Spartans,' and he has licensed music for soundtrack use to Disney. His latest hip-hop project is also film-themed: with Spytec, he has been working on a trilogy of pulp movie / US hip-hop mashup projects , the first of which is ‘Bullitt vs. Busta.’ The trilogy will continue with 'Cool Hand Luke vs. Kweli,' and will conclude with 'Enter the Dragon vs. Nas.'

The combination of funky, chopped up Lalo Schiffrin riffs and intense Busta accapellas (featuring guests such as Q-Tip, Madd Rapper, Pharrell and Missy Elliott) is a sure-fire winner, and a great party album.

Spytec & Vigilante Bio

>>DOWNLOAD BULLITT VS. BUSTA

MICOLAND & HOLLY BRETTON

Producer Micoland and singer Holly Bretton are a Leeds-based duo who make dubstep and electronica for the superlative netlabel Dead Channel. Their album Traverse was one of my favourites of last year, and is still available for free download. Check out this awesome video for Static.

Micoland & Holly Bretton on MySpace

HE-MAN FAN ART IS AWESOME

Check this out, thank Grimly.

HARLEQUINADE PLAYED ON WFMU

Stream the show here. WFMU is one of New York's biggest independent radio stations.

ASTHMATIC ASTRONAUT @ THE GRV, 22 JAN

Asthmatic Astronaut plays at Riddim Tuffa at The GRV in Edinburgh, on 22 Jan. Riddim Tuffa is an internationally celebrated and long-running reggae / dancehall night. DJ AA will be supplying his eclectic brand of beats, breaks and cuts. This night is a soundclash with Big Toe's Hi-Fi. Check out the latest releases by Asthmatic Astronaut on Black Lantern Music.

MORPHAMISH @ THE BONGO CLUB, 24 JAN

My partner on the now-finished Double Helix project, and head honcho of soon-to-be-launched Black Lantern Channel Urge Mode, Morphamish is playing the Temporary Autonomous Arts Rave Tour on Jan 24 at The Bongo Club in Edinburgh.

The night features Morphamish, Alex Laptop, Beast, Edin-Tek, Extremist, Krumbledore, Retrend, Terek, The Apprentice, Vinyl Vandal, Zonk, Nass, Synkopath and Damaged Electronics provide electro, dubstep, drum'n'bass and dance. Check out some forthcoming Morphamish releases for Black Lantern and other labels at his SoundCloud page.

WEAPONWEAR CLOTHING STORE OPEN FOR BUSINESS!

We've been planning this one for a while, and we're very pleased to announce the grand opening of the WeaponWear online store!

A while back, we held a logo design competition - the winning design was by Paul Sizer, whose comprehensive package of banners, logos and insignias was just begging to be turned into wearable apparel.

There were also some incredible designs by Jack Crowder, Winneganfake, Yoav Segal and Mo Ali - in the end, it was just too hard to resisit turning all of the designs into shirts.

All the designs in the WeaponWear range are customisable - you can change the colour, style, cut and garment of each product. We have everything from hoodies to baby onesies, and each design can be adapted to suit your needs. There are a range of pricing options, from £10.95 basic tees to luxury garments.

Weaponizer has always been run by the generous contributions of writers, artists, designers and journalists - now you can help us keep the site going by rocking a Weaponizer tee-shirt! All designers receive a share of the profits - the rest goes towards keeping the site running. We thank you all in advance for your support!

Keep your eyes on the store - we'll be releasing some variations on these logo shirts (including Yoav's designs) in the months to come, and have plans to expand the range to include limited edition art prints, Black Lantern Music tees, and much, much more!

If you do buy a tee-shirt, please take a picture of yourself wearing it, and send it to editor.weaponizer@gmail.com. We'll add it to our Flickr page, and have a fashion show!

We'd like to extend a massive, huge thank you to Dmitri, Paul, Yo, Jack and Mo for their support and enthusiasm, and as always to the folks that run Whitechapel for hosting our competition, and letting us workshop some ideas on the forum.

/texture & monkeytribe, Glasvegas, Jan2010

SERIAL - STILLETTO EYE & RAZORGUT AND THE UNDERGROUND UNDEAD

Sometimes, heroes need no introduction. If you haven't already, go and read the whole serial from the start. For those of you eagerly awaiting the next adventure... lets have a big cheer for the return of STILLETTO EYE & RAZORGUT! A product of the warped creative minds of Dwayne Coltrane and the HyperDeathPsychoRock 3.

Behind the sleigh dogs pulling all manner of climbing, drilling and camping equipment and provisions and a slow shambling expedition of men huddled into their fur jackets and face masks against the blistering and icy wind, StilletoEye and RazorGut cruised gently along in Betsy, their 55 Cadillac, Louis Jordan on the stereo, milkshakes and cheeseburgers in hand ...READ MORE

SHORT STORY: HEX

Here's a cyberpunk piece I wrote while I was in New York last year, as a sort of 'write-off' with Harlequinade. His piece is being turned into something else entirely. Mine kind of stands alone as a dark little nugget of digital voodoo. Enjoy.

Sara treads the damp pavement warily. Peering past the translucent wash of GPS data from her UrbanLayers app, a glowing green tracery laid over the rain-slicked avenue, trailing off into the impenetrable darkness of obscure alleys, she breathes in shallow, nervous gasps. UrbanLayers is almost pointless this far into the Zone. At a certain point, the information stops, and there is just rain, brick, flesh: all indistinct in the gloom, un-illuminated ...READ MORE

FEATURE: HOW TO BE A NINJA IN ONE EASY LESSON

Itinerant weirdness-hound and veteran psychonaut Grimly Whetfox has a spcial lesson for us today. Ever wanted to explore the inner recesses of your own consciousness? To confront the demons, angels and aliens that exist, without question, within the homan mind? Can't afford drinking, smoking or anything else, but still want to watch weird shit happen? You, my friend, need to follow the way of the ninja... Let Grimly be your guide to the world of LUCID DREAMING! Watch out, things might get a little freaky.

FLASH: MEDICINE

New writer Vertigo Jones, a self-assembly model, animator and goat enthusiast, brings us a dystopian tale of future biotech medicine gone wrong. This is a darkly funny little piece that will appeal to fans of Burroughs, Gibson and Ellis.

Franklin was a data sink for some company down In the bay and that was why he’d been targeted. He was a big guy, regularly exercised and had once boasted about how he had mylomar implants throughout his musculature, to make his tennis serve better. He, like everyone else, was security minded, so it must have taken some degree of professionalism for his attackers to intercept the order for shopping and deceive the house security ...READ MORE

SERIAL: OPERATION SUNRISE, PART 5

Grimly Whetfox continues his para-psychological thriller OPERATION SUNRISE today. Chapter 5 starts with a rush. Who's having a line?

She cut the powder quickly, breaking up the rocks as best she could, cursing as the occasional lump pinged away from under the edge of the flexible plastic credit card. The toilet stall was not ideal for the task, but this one was better suited than many of the other places she had used, so relatively it was manageable. Anywhere would have done just now, after that. That had been.... horrible. That rat fucking bastard. He was fucking with her mind somehow, she was sure of that, but by what method she didn't understand. It was impossible he had set this up from the start. Impossible. Too many factors... Too much had happened ...READ MORE

FLASH: THE NIGHTWALK

Some serious psychological horror here, short sharp and shocking, from writer / Black Lantern emcee Harlequinade (Sileni / Chemical Poets). Messing with some long-standing genre conventions to stunning effect, this is a tight, controlled burst of real-life horror prose.

I hate this part of town, but it’s where all the upmarket bars are, and therefore full of the kind of women I’m after. I’d been sitting nursing a beer, watching them walk past, for about twenty minutes, before a pretty blonde came and sat in the stool next to me. She started asking me something about my suit, or my watch, or the weather…it doesn’t matter, we both knew what she was asking. But I made my excuses and left. That’s not how I want to do this. That’s not how I can do this ...READ MORE

FLASH: JUST BUSINESS

Sometimes you really have to wonder about Andre Navarro's imagination. Everything he writes is a little unsettling, but this latest Flash piece leaves a particularly bizarre and tangy taste in the mouth. It's kind of a Western. It's the story of a bartender, a customer, his beer, and a secret ingredient. That's really all you need to know. That, and also that Andre is possibly somewhat touched...

Henry the Bartender stared longingly at the empty chairs of his empty saloon in a far-from-empty town, bursting with gold miners in the Year Of Our Lord 1852. It had been like this for a month, since another saloon had been opened across the street from his by Theodore the Other Bartender. As soon as a patron tasted Theodore's soon-to-be legendary beer, Henry was ruined, seeing the crowd that practically lived inside his saloon leave day by day, patron by patron, the bunch of unloyal fuckers ...READ ON

NEW SPACE SHARK!

Brought to you by Team Mummy. Click to read.

NEW FLASH - DAYLIGHT ROBBERY

Grimly Whetfox must barely have time to frequent the dens and opium houses of his native Constantinople, so productive is he. Perhaps its the ravages of a broken heart, perhaps its the ravages of andvanced syphillis... either way, today Mr Whetfox has love on his mind... stand as far back as possible.

What's that old saying? 'She may look hot, but somebody, somewhere, is fucking sick of her.'

Hah.

I had done well. Well, not really well, but, y'know... okay. Not bad. Not too shabby at all. I was drinking but that's like deckchairs on the titanic, and by no means useless; bars are good places to fish. I was having no problems fucking my way through the foreign female population of this town anyway, breaking hearts with gay abandon as I used the false memory of 'her' as a shield to protect myself from ever being the one in the relationship to cry when the other one left ...READ MORE

NEW FLASH - MARS

Introducing Lynsey Miller, whose bio was pretty short and mysterious... all we know about the glamorous and deadly miss Miller is that she is a film-maker and writer, and that this is her first submission to Weaponizer: Mars, a slice of social realist dark comedy. Enjoy as part of a balanced diet.

I’m fifteen years old and my ma is just about to give birth. She’s exhausted and in agony and really needs someone to hold her hand but I’m pretty disgusted by the whole thing so I leave the room. That’s when I see her. Sitting alone in the corridor. Drinking cold coffee out one of those minging little plastic cups, trying to look all sophisticated. She was waiting on her boyfriend. The kid being born in the next room was his third. It was just a shag she says, it’s me he really loves. She’s pretty hot so I could just about believe it ...READ MORE

SERIAL - STILLETTO EYE & RAZORGUT AND THE HOWLING HOMUNCULUS

As always, it gives me great pleasure to introduce the legendary delta blues / swamp rock / black metal / apocalyptic space crunk supergroup that is.... Dwayne Coltrane & The HyperDeathPsychoRock Three! Did I get that right? Man, it's hard to think with a Samurai sword pressed right up against your ballsack.... but I digest. Today's episode sees our heroes StillettoEye and RazorGut come up against a whole castle full of villains and freaks. The Boschian excesses of this installment will chill your very soul.

They were unable to budge the huge forbidding wooden doors with knockers the size of a whole human torso, when they swung gently open, and the Count came out to greet them. He bade them enter and to make themselves at home, before showing them to the dining room, where more of the deformed villagers hurried around, laying the table, spilling drink and tripping each other up; all gibbering and spitting in some archaic Gypsy tongue ...READ MORE

SERIAL - OPERATION SUNRISE, PART 4

Operation Sunrise, the ongoing para-psychological thriller from the pen of Grimly Whetfox, continues today with a subject that is close to all our hearts: Beer. I castigated Whetfox for being a drunkard and a lowlife yesterday, so I won't go on here. Just grab yourself a brewski, sit back, and read this:

He sat right at the bar, it made things quicker, and took a final long slug from the beer, tasting the fresh foam at the bottom of the glass, dropping it quickly to the bar and looking round. The barmaid raised an eyebrow and commented that he'd better not drink them all like that, or he'd be broke and she'd beexhausted. He took that to mean she wouldn't throw out a paying customer, even if he got a bit drunk, and settled further into a hunched posture on a tatty stool ...READ MORE

SERIAL - 2019, CHAPTER 2: TIMELINE

2019 is Texture's attempt to create a 'verse for other writers to muck about in. He has been laying down the groundwork of a nanotech adventure, set nine years into our future. Chapter Two is a timeline, with embedded links to some interesting texts on nanotech.

READ ON!

FLASH: MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

Notorious social deviant and known domestic terrorist Grimly Whetfox has returned like a wolf upon the fold to the Weaponizer collective. As we publish his ongoing para-psychological thriller Operation Sunrise, he has decided to give us some more nuggets of joy, starting with this dark little tale, Message in a Bottle. First published on Christmas Day, it's a pretty little thing with mad eyes. Read on, if you dare.

The postmark said Halloween 2008. Fuck. How long had that been sitting there? He felt stupid. He really would have to find a way to be more organised with the mail. Right now it was like a frikin' treasure hunt, for god’s sakes. He walked through to the kitchen with the box, amazed at the weight of the package. It was fuck-off huge, and heavy as hell. The pink wrapping paper had faded slightly, but he could see whoever had wrapped it had definitely taken some time over it ...READ MORE